10 Properties Of Toxic Parents
While we believe that absolute freedom is positive for our children, it can be a behavior of toxic parents that has negative effects.
Parents are not aware that their behavior harms their children. Attempts to be good parents often fail because of fundamental mistakes. What are the characteristics of toxic parents.
Parents don’t have to be perfect, but they should understand that certain behaviors can have negative effects in practice.
Today’s post is about 10 Traits of Toxic Parents To Avoid. It is important to be open and accept that parents can make mistakes too.
1. I achieve what I want with manipulation
Parents who manipulate their children? Yes, there are parents who take advantage of their children to get what they want. This is one of the traits of toxic parents.
While they think that their children will not notice this, they leave behind deep emotional wounds that can seriously affect their children in the future.
In doing so, parents create negative feelings, such as guilt, in order to get their children to do what they want them to do.
2. Aggression
It’s not just about physical aggression, but also verbal. Another trait of toxic parents.
Toxic parents insult their children and often humiliate them, resulting in a lack of self-esteem in the children.
Exhaustion, responsibilities, and day-to-day obligations often lead parents to lose the patience necessary to properly address problems.
3. They know I love them. Why should I prove that?
A lack of love and affective attention often leads to emotional dependence. In adulthood, those affected are often suspicious and can only enter into unstable relationships.
Affection and affection are of the utmost importance. We have to show our children love, this is the only way they can grow up healthy and happy.
4. I don’t care about your worries
Do you remember those moments when your parents didn’t listen to you? Did you share your secrets with them? A lack of communication leads to distrust, and as a result children cannot express themselves freely.
Parents who fail to communicate with their children prevent them from expressing their feelings and emotions. The children can therefore not deal with it, feelings are not let out.
When you listen to your children, you show them your love and how important they are to you. Active listening is very important!
5. I don’t like your friends
You cannot choose or control your children’s friends. If you don’t accept their friends, they will rise up against you.
Your children are different from you. Maybe they belong to a certain group that you don’t like or their friends smoke. But there are things that cannot be controlled.
As long as your children are respectful, happy, and themselves, you should n’t forbid them to be friends with certain people.
6. You have to learn, you have to do this or that …
We often have false expectations: we want to turn them into teachers, doctors, lawyers, musicians. But have you asked your children what they really want to do?
Sometimes it doesn’t depend on will, but more on what they can do. If science subjects are difficult for them, can’t you expect them to become doctors?
This only causes frustration, despair, and disapproval within the family. Let your children choose which path to take.
7. You are incapable of doing this, I am – a trait of toxic parents
Toxic parents try to teach their children correct behavior, but do not do it themselves.
Examples are the frequent use of swear words or aggressive behavior towards others.
Do you keep telling your children that this is not right, even though you are doing so yourself? They will imitate you. There is no place for contradictions in education.
8. You have to get good grades
There are parents who ask too much of their children. Do you remember your classmate crying for not getting the best grade while you were satisfied with enough?
Some parents ask too much. This is another trait of toxic parents. Of course, good grades are important, but you also have to take various influencing factors into account.
The child had a bad day, they don’t like the subject, they can’t get along with the teacher … if only one exam fails, it’s not that bad.
It is a learning process and not a competition.
9. Don’t worry, I’ll protect you
Overprotection is the worst thing a parent can do. Children never learn to make independent decisions and to solve their own problems.
Then when they grow up and have to take care of themselves on their own, they feel lost and unable to cope with certain situations.
It is not good to raise children in a bubble where they are protected from everything. Only through mistakes can one learn and move forward and mature.
10. Eat and drink what you want
Children have to live healthy habits as an example. There is no place for alcohol in adolescence, smoking or other unhealthy habits.
You thus receive a wrong view of the world and cannot distinguish between what is good and bad. In addition, unhealthy habits can make children or young people fall ill at an early age.
Toxic parents can be very negative not only for their children but also for themselves. They should learn to be good role models and accept that anyone can make mistakes, including themselves.
Children are not to blame for and should not suffer from their parents’ mistakes or poor upbringing.